A Dating App Match Is Abusive or Threatening
These guides draw on official safety guidance, research, and common questions from people using dating apps. Read the scope and limits.
You do not have to keep explaining yourself to someone who is insulting, threatening, or sexually pressuring you. The priority is to create distance and keep a record of what happened.
When the tone turns threatening
Do not try to win the argument.
You do not need to answer insults, sexual demands, or threats.
Keep the profile, messages, dates, links, and any payment request.
Use the service's tools. Tell someone you trust what is happening.
If you feel in immediate danger, contact local emergency services.
What abusive behavior can look like
- insulting you when you say no or ask to slow down
- sending unwanted sexual messages or demanding private images
- threatening to expose information, images, or conversations
- repeatedly contacting you after you block or stop replying
- trying to isolate you from friends or make you feel responsible for their behavior
You do not need to decide whether the person is a scammer before protecting yourself. Harassment and threats are enough reason to stop contact.
What to do now
- Stop replying and do not negotiate with threats.
- Save screenshots, the profile link, usernames, and dates without forwarding the material around.
- Block and report the account through the dating or messaging service.
- Tell someone you trust. If the person knows where you live, work, or study, let them know what is happening.
- If there is immediate danger or a credible threat, contact local emergency services or a relevant local support service.
Read the eSafety online dating safety guidance for information about controlling and abusive behavior online.
You do not have to handle this alone
Take a private look at what happened.
Answer a few questions about pressure, threats, privacy, and what to do next.
Start the free checkQuestions people ask
Before you decide what to do
What should I do if a dating match threatens me?
Stop arguing, save the messages and profile, block the account, and report it through the service. If you feel in immediate danger, contact local emergency services.
Is sexual pressure from a dating match harassment?
Unwanted sexual messages, requests, threats, or pressure are not something you have to accept. Save the evidence and use the app's reporting and blocking tools.
Before you reply or meet
Want another look?
A few questions can help you spot what is making you uneasy before you move off the app, share personal information, or agree to meet.
Start the free safety checkRealAttraction.today is an independent resource and is not affiliated with, endorsed by, or sponsored by any dating app or service.